Divorcing when you have children: advice for entrepreneurs

For entrepreneurs, personal life challenges often run in parallel with the pressures of running a business. Divorcing when you have children can add significant emotional and logistical complexity — potentially impacting both home and work life.

Solicitor-director Gina Samuel-Richards of AGR Law shares expert advice on how separating couples can approach child arrangements constructively. From clear communication to legal considerations, Gina offers insight designed to help parents prioritise their children’s wellbeing while managing a difficult transition.

AGR Law’s solicitor-director, Gina Samuel-Richards, tells us that divorcing couples find supporting and managing children is one of the most complex aspects to navigate.

In this article, Gina provides practical advice to help you and your ex-spouse make arrangements regarding your child or children.

How to communicate with your child

Gina tells us that it’s crucial for divorcing parents to create a supportive environment for children. She says, “Divorcing is likely to be a highly emotional time, with one or both of you possibly feeling angry, confused, betrayed, shocked, sad and more.

“Whilst these feelings are normal, they can make focusing on finding practical solutions to build your child’s future difficult.”

Gina tells us parents need to encourage open communication so they can understand how their children are feeling and help them adapt to changes.

She says, “It’s essential for both parents to separate their personal feelings about each other and the divorce from their interactions with their children.”

She advises anyone finding this overwhelming or difficult to seek professional help from charities such as Relate or speak to a counsellor or mediator.

Children cope much better when conflict is reduced, so it’s vital to have discussions and make decisions regarding your child when they are not around to overhear or interrupt. Always communicate with each other directly, not via your child.

Resolution, the membership body for family law professionals who resolve issues constructively, has some useful advice on communicating with children. If you are struggling to agree on important matters, seek help from a legal professional or mediator.

Will we need to go to court to decide arrangements for our children?

Gina explained that there are certain aspects that often lead to conflicts during divorce or separation, such as deciding where the children will reside, determining the amount of time they will spend with each parent, and working out how and where special occasions like birthdays and Christmas will be celebrated.

She said, “Every family is unique, and finding a solution that works for all parties involved may require patience and compromise.”

If parents can have discussions, the courts will not intervene in matters related to their children until they have explored every possible solution to reach conclusions but have been unsuccessful in doing so. However, if the divorce is due to domestic abuse, the courts may intervene to protect the safety of the parent and child.

Parents may also need to go to court if:

• They’re worried about their child’s safety or wellbeing when they are with the other parent
• They feel vulnerable or controlled by their ex-partner
• Their spouse refuses them access to their child
• Their former partner is alienating them and they are purposefully sabotaging any opportunities they have of having a meaningful relationship with their child. Parental alienation can include making false allegations to persuade authorities they are not fit to be a parent or manipulating the child into not wishing to spend time with them.

In such cases, Gina advises people to speak to a legal professional who may deem it necessary to apply for a court order known as a ‘child arrangements order.’

Additionally, a ‘specific issue order’ can stipulate how the child is raised. This can include which school they will attend or whether they will be brought up to follow a specific religion. A ‘prohibited steps order’ can be applied for if a parent needs to stop the other one from making any decisions about their child’s upbringing without informing them or discussing matters with them.

Gina says, “Court intervention is sometimes necessary but should be considered a last resort if the couple are on speaking terms. Fees and legal representation can be very costly, and the process will likely be stressful and time-consuming for all parties.”

Who is responsible for the costs of looking after children?

Responsibility for costs associated with the child lies with both parents, with the parent no longer residing with the family expected to make maintenance payments until the child is 16 (or 20 if still in full-time education).

If the parents cannot agree on a payment amount, the Child Maintenance Service (CMS) will determine it. The CMS can also act if the parent responsible for these payments doesn’t pay.

Gina explains, “The amount of maintenance required can depend on several factors, such as the parent’s income, the number of nights the child spends with them, and any other responsibilities the parent has.”

Use this useful calculator to work out payments.

Can we make the arrangements for our children legally binding?

Arrangements for your children can be kept informal and flexible, and parents are under no obligation to formalise arrangements. However, if parents disagree, are not amicable or are unable to communicate, a court can make child arrangements legally binding through a ‘consent order.’

The consent order can cover all aspects of childcare, such as where the child will live, how much time they spend with each parent, and when and where this contact takes place. It can form part of an overall consent order relating to other aspects of divorce, such as finances, property and maintenance payments.

AGR Law

AGR Law is an award-winning law firm advising individuals and families on all aspects of divorce and child arrangements. They pride themselves on their children-first, non-confrontational approach to divorce. Contact them on 0116 340 0094, or email hello@agrlaw.co.uk, or visit their website www.agrlaw.co.uk.